Hide the Beer, the Pastor's Here!

The following article is stolen in its entirety from LarkNews.com. If you don't subscribe to their free monthly newsletter, you really should.

WATERVILLE, Maine — After stepping down from the pastorate last month after fifty years in ministry, Albert Finley did something no one expected: he had his first beer.

"I was curious what it actually tasted like, after all these years of preaching against it," he says. The results? "What a marvelous drink," he says. "It tastes much better than it smells." The Sierra Nevada Pale Ale he chose delivered "surprisingly complex and satisfying tastes." "I actually said ‘Praise God’ right in the middle of it," he says.

But people in his former congregation are not happy. "He’s tarnishing the reputation of himself and this church," says one woman. "I always pointed to the pastor and told my kids, ‘See? There’s a man who has chosen not to drink.’ This puts a big question mark after everything he has preached."

Another says Finley reminds her of Noah, "a righteous man who ended up a worthless drunk," she says.

But Finley says he no longer has to be an example. He is also upset that he has held misconceptions about beer for so long. "My dad always told me you could get drunk off of one sip, and I preached that for decades," he says. "I thought that’s why people on beer commercials were having such fun. But that’s completely untrue. I’ve had one, even two beers with no effect."

Finley says he relishes the flavor of hops and barley, and favors darker stouts and the more robust ales to the pale lagers.

He always thought post-ministry life would be "sort of puttering around the house, praying for the world and so forth." But beer has changed his mind. "I subscribe to a beer of the month club, so every week I have a new bottle in my fridge to try. Sometimes that’s my main reason for waking up," he says.

He has been emboldened to make other lifestyle changes as well. "This weekend I might just see a movie in an actual theater," he says. "I understand it’s quite an experience."

The title of this blog comes from the classic Daniel Amos/Swirling Eddies song by the same name. Lyrics here and video here.

ITP

ITP: Inside the Perimeter, noun, adj., adv.: an abbreviation for "Inside the Perimeter," relating to the area inside Atlanta's I-285 loop highway. Contrasted with OTP, "Outside the Perimeter, which is all the area of Atlanta outside of I-285.

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ITP and OTP are much more than geographic descriptions. They divide states of mind and ways of being. ITP is urban and Democratic; OTP is suburban and Republican. Old money lives ITP; new money lives OTP. Gays and lawyers reside ITP; straights and corporate people will be found OTP. All the cool restaurants and coffee shops are ITP; it's hard to find anything other than chain restaurants and corporate coffee shops OTP. People ITP drive Smart cars or ride bikes or walk; people OTP drive SUVs or SUVs or SUVs. ITP couture is funky-cool; OTP couture is Polo-Macys.

Before attending my Emory class last night ("Wednesdays at Atlanta's Microbreweries"), I stopped by an ITP coffeehouse for some caffeine fortification, grabbed a table outside, and overheard a conversation that could only happen ITP. A youngish man (30?) talking with a similarly youngish woman, who seemed to be his counselor or therapist or life coach or Scientology leader or something. I only picked up snippets over the traffic noise of the busy intersection, but it went something like this:

He: "Yes, my parents . . . family . . . frustrated . . . Do I really want to start a relationship with a pot-smoking graduate student? But I do like him . . . he doesn't smoke that much . . . my dissertation . . . watching pornography and measuring . . . "

She: "An unusual dissertation . . . a bunch of guys jacking off . . . "

Somehow, I found it difficult to concentrate on my book of Orthodox theology.

Attending the Papal Mass?

As you may have heard, the Pope will be in the U.S. next week. He'll celebrate Mass on April 17 in Washington, DC. In anticipation of this event, the local transit system produced a commercial encouraging people to ride the subway.

The Archdiocese protested that the spot was irreverent, and it was pulled. I agree that it's not appropriate. Besides the hat being the wrong color, the depiction fails to show Benedict with a German lager in his hand. On the other hand, when's the last time you saw a commercial in Latin? Check it out:



Here's a short news story on YouTube about the controversy:

I'll Drink to That

"I would like a great lake of ale for the King of kings, and I would like for heaven's family to be drinking it through all eternity."

-- St. Brigid of Kildare (451-525)

Augustine On: True Brothers

The young adults group at my church is starting a 6-week series on authentic manhood. Too many grow up in our society with inadequate male role models; it's no wonder that we feel lost and act clueless when it comes to what a "real man" is. Add the modifier of "real Christian man," and it gets at once simpler and more complex.

So we're going to take 6 weeks, get all the 20-something men together on Tuesday nights, and talk about this. We'll spend part of each meeting watching an episode from the HBO series, "Band of Brothers," hear interpretive talks from older and younger men in the church (including yours truly), and discuss it all in smaller groups. Since we'll be meeting in a bar, we'll be able to drink beer, which we all know is a sign of authentic manhood.

I like what Augustine has to say about the band of brothers which God desires for us to have: "They are my true brothers, because whether they see good in me or evil, they love me still" (Confessions, X.3).

That's hardly a comprehensive description of brotherhood, but it's an awfully good start.

Drink this Beer, Save the World

Have you seen the new film, Amazing Grace? It's a little bit about John Newton, the redeemed slave trader who wrote the hymn by that name (though not to the tune we know, by the way). But the movie is mostly about William Wilberforce, who, motivated by the gospel - the God of the gospel, actually - fought for decades in the British Parliament to abolish slavery in the British empire. Unfortunately, the movie somewhat minimizes the religious aspect and makes it more a story of political machinations. Nevertheless, it's a moving story (I cried 3 times), and I recommend it.

So imagine my delight to find that Wilberforce has been commemorated with his own beer - from a Christian brewery in England, no less (notice the subtle fishes in the brewery logo). It's a fair trade beer, and a portion of the profits will be donated to stop human trafficking (a.k.a. the slave trade) in today's world. Alas, it looks like we'll have to go to England to be able to drink any of this righteous beverage.